Porn Erection & Ejaculation
So where to start? Perhaps it’s best to segment the conversation across 2 themes: psychological and mechanical.
Psychological
Sexuality is intimate. Everybody has their own and everyone’s should be accepted without shame or guilt so long as it is consenting or does not abuse power. Porn is an escape, and when one can’t get sex from other consenting adults, it’s an obvious substitute.
Everything in moderation is okay. However, highly addictive things are not because it is so easy to fall into the extremes. Porn is absolutely addictive. Some of our team here at Kegel Hard have been exposed to porn at a very young age (under 10 years old) and still have a hard time controlling it, even in adulthood. Today’s kids are all carrying their own electronic devices, and it’s almost impossible to prevent them from being exposed to porn, or at least to the hyper-sexualized advertisement and media of today’s society. It is hard to predict what the impact will be in the next 10/20 years.
As it relates to actual sexual performance, it is hard to come up with positives from watching porn. First, it’s completely fake. It’s like watching WWC wrestling for tips on how to fight in real life. If that’s your strategy, you will definitely get your ass whooped! On that subject too, it makes you believe that girls are ready to have sex as soon as it starts, love giving rough BJs, are always ready for anal, and love your man juices everywhere. Some girls do like that, but in our humble opinion it seems a lot more prefer to get romanced. Also, on the internet, sex never smells and is always perfectly cleaned. Real life can be quite different! If you are not ready for reality, the real thing might actually turn you off a bit = loss of erection.
Okay, so besides giving you a false perception of sex, what else? Well, we wish we could find again this post from the Nofap community (an insanely great resource and powerful guide), but someone suggested that because the entire point of porn is to cum (or edge), you are essentially gearing up your brain to focus on ejaculation the minute sex starts. Guess what, that’s the best way to ejaculate prematurely!
Last but not least, a lot of today’s porn is pretty dominant. Treating women like objects fosters aggression instead of love, the source of all happiness.
Mechanically
The psychological impact of porn is frequently discussed and debated. The above are fairly common point of views. However, the real issue that we uncovered here at Kegel Hard and that none have talked about in our opinion, is the impact of porn on pelvic floor muscles!
We alluded to it in a previous post (How to Do Kegels for Men), but beyond the psychological impact of porn, what were are most concerned with here is the fact that you are beating your stick for hours sitting down with 0 pelvic engagement. If having sex was like playing basketball, porn would be like going to eating contests almost every day and hoping to get drafted by the NBA. It doesn’t work!
As you may recall from our post on the male anatomy (A Minimalist Guide to the Male Anatomy), the pelvic floor muscles are like a trampoline at the bottom of your hips supporting all your sexual organs (and gastrointestinal as well). When you sit, the trampoline stretches. The higher your knees are from you hips (e.g. sitting in a low chair), the more the trampoline is stretched.
Now take your average 30min (yes, sometimes hour and a half:) porn session, and what you are doing is beating your stretched trampoline with up and down hand motions. Just like a stretched rubber band, you now have a stretched out and weak pelvic floor, the perfect way to get erectile dysfunction and premature ejaculation.
What to do?
Obviously, it would be great to fully abstain from porn. The Nofap guys have a point. The less you cum the more energy you have. We are not experts, but that’s pretty much the goal of Tantra, i.e. the recanalization of sexual energy for spiritual purposes.
Now, what if you can’t stop masturbating? By the way, nobody here at Kegel Hard has been able to go longer than 2 weeks :) Masturbating less will absolutely increase your sexual performance because you’ll have that much more energy. However, if you do have to masturbate, we would recommend not using your hand. Essentially anything where you can put your penis in and create the motion with your hips, thrusting your pelvis and engaging your pelvic muscles. On the free side, there is anything from fruits to a curled up towel. Quite frankly, anything you can make a whole from! On the more expensive side, there are the sex dolls (from a $50+ for just a butt, to $1,000+ for a full realistic model). Regardless of how you do it, the entire point is to not use your hands. You got to move your hips back and forth. Just like what you would do if you actually had sex! Guess what too, by masturbating as if you were having sex, it’s actually a great practice for when you will have actual sex!
We can’t stress this enough: reduce porn if your libido is not very high. And absolutely stop masturbating with your hand. Use your hips and body just like in the real thing! An added benefit is that since masturbating this way is almost like a practice/workout, you can actually feel good about yourself doing it! It’s also a great time to experiment with your reactions and your moves so that you are ready for game time!